Passion

{Learning Experience #2}
Passion: An intense, driving, or overmastering feeling or conviction.

     Last weekend, I attended the Passion 2015 Conference in Houston, TX.  If you do not know what this event is, to state it simply, it is a massive conference of more than 10,000 Christians joining in prayer, worship, and discussion about Jesus Christ.  Basically, it was a huge and amazing Jesus rave. 

     Now, back track around 20 years ago.  I was born in a small town in Los Angeles, California on December 13, 1994.  I have lived within a minute drive to the beach my entire life and have worn jeans and a short-sleeve t-shirt 90% of the time (aka the weather is perfect).  I have eaten countless amounts of In-N-Out burgers and worn over 10 variations of the same Converse shoe.  More significantly, I went to Catholic school for twelve years, but was consistently surrounded by a not-so religious atmosphere.  I cannot perfectly explain what California is like, but to best sum it up in a nutshell: “You do you.”  Do whatever makes you happy.  Nothing is impossible.  Chase your dreams.   Be yourself.  Be indie.  Be different.  Be wild.

     When I decided to make the big move to TCU in the fall of 2013, I do not think I knew how Texas was going to change me in so many wonderful ways, the biggest one being my faith.  Growing up in California, believing and following one God is not popular or mainstream whatsoever.  Being different, hipster, Buddhist, gay, or eclectic, were all acceptable identities, but not a devout Christian.  When I came to Texas, I found my faith and that was something so alien and different to me. 

     Often times I find myself comparing myself to other people, whether that may be through grades, popularity, or faith.  At Passion, I saw the most religious and “on fire for Christ” people I have ever seen and that was intimidating to me.  People were raising their hands in worship, closing their eyes, and screaming out of unrestrained joy.  And then, there was me, swaying slightly and singing softly.  And I felt worthless.  I felt like my love and my relationship with God was nothing compared to these people.  I felt like God was looking down on this conference gazing so admiringly on these people and looking with pity upon my small and meek performance of affection. 

     However, by the end of this life-changing conference, it hit me.  God judges hearts.  This is a perfect example of His unending and eternal love for us!  He simply looks at our hearts, which He has created and controls righteously.   

     For 1 Samuel 16:7 explains: “But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him.  The Lord does not look at the things man looks at.  Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."'
     How comforting is this to know that we worship a sovereign, just, and perfect creator that judges our hearts!  It is not our outward displays of affection, the amount of bible studies we attend, or the number of days we have quiet times that impress Him, but only our hearts.
     Looking back upon my days at Passion, I realized that I may not have been the typical Passion attendee and I may not have raised my hands enough times to show others that I love Jesus, but I knew one thing for certain, that I have a deep-rooted passion for Christ and He, himself, is a witness to it.  In fact, He is the creator of it.  How great is that.